Years ago a friend, Gailann Bruen, gave a talk for our holistic community. As a financial advisor as the root of her talk she sought to teach us a more spiritual way to look at money.
“What do you remember from your childhood that was said about money?” was the perfect question she asked that sent my mind off into my history.
What did my parents say and what did they demonstrate money was about?
“Money doesn’t grow on trees.”
“We don’t have enough.”
I heard that my very talented father, was not allowed to start his own business as a carpenter. My mother’s fear of lack of a paycheck overpowered his need to do what he loved. He spent almost every evening down in our basement building our furniture. He used knotty pine because it was what he could afford. He called it the cheapest available.
Over and over I heard, “we can’t afford that.”
Most of the talk in our home centered on the lack of money. All the words about money created an atmosphere of despair rather than appreciation for what they did have.
In that fateful class I learned how that shaped my fear of never having enough. I kept change in my coat pockets, in my purse, in a jar, hoping that it would help me feel safe when I needed another dollar.
Whether you have money to spend or struggle with it, the steps I took may help make the journey with money a little more enjoyable.
About fifteen years before Gailann’s class I began a journey of gratitude prayers despite the obvious difficulties and lack of resources. I was determined not to repeat the attitude I had seen. It had been so sad and without complete understanding, I still felt that regardless of how much or how little we have, the attitude matters more.
Crisis and crossroads move us faster or keep us frozen. My crisis was a history of being a crime victim several times, left disabled and no longer could work as a nurse, two children, no financial support. Although I was married a second time, when I was nine months pregnant he lost his job and decided not to work for a year. Unemployment checks did not cover our bottom line.
I began to lay down for ten minutes a day and belly breath like a baby. Soon that became a task that I found so useful that I would do it at a stop sign (not laying down of course!). Anytime I was put on hold on a call I would belly breath and other moments similar to that. I found that simple act allowed my anxiety, constant being overwhelmed, and more to quiet down.
From there it grew to thinking how grateful I was that I could breath at all. I realized what every philosophy and religion has said – it is all inside. I started allowing my ideas on what to do to blossom. Still shy I was able to create a little income doing what I loved.
I made zucchini bread, inexpensive and the children loved it. A friend dropped by and had a piece. She asked if I could make a dozen for a party. She paid me! Someone else admired my embroidered workshirt I was wearing. I didn’t tell her it was to cover the holes in the shirt. She paid me to do two of them. A friend of her asked me for one, then another. Within a few months my intuition was showing along with the ability I found as a nurse to combine both skills and use it as a medical intuitive. People started showing up at my door gifting me with thank you’s. After a few months I started charging. I was in business and never looked backed. That was in 1975.
So what about money? How does that fit with “it’s all inside”? Is it just money or what?
I saw money as an exchange of energy rather than a paycheck I deposited then spent. When I wrote checks for all the needs, electric, phone, and more I had gratitude. I thought “what did it take for the world to give me the ability to simply turn on a switch and have indoor light?”
By the time I was done considering all the hundreds and thousands of individual inventors, workers, creators of the trucks to haul the equipment, all the people who did the work, drove the trucks, worked in the factories, the creating of manufacturing plants just so I could turn on electricity, I was totally humbled and forever grateful. I wrote those checks filled with joy and love for all that it took for me to flip a switch. What a difference it made in my day! I started doing that at the gas station, shopping for food and all else.
Accumulating an attitude of gratitude opened a door for the realization that money is not really anything other than a value of time and energy transformed into something we decide to pay for. It could be an object like clothing or food or it could be a service like a plumber or electrician or anything else I use money for.
Suddenly money was about self-respect and respect of all others who participated in opening the door to the magic of filling the tank of my car, using a phone and all the rest.
With Gailann’s comments I realized I still needed to clean out the leftovers, the beliefs that were formed as a child. Because of my understanding that I am not suppose to poison myself or anyone I had been choosing organic food and products for personal care and home use since I began working at home. I chose that path over health insurance for years. Not being able to afford both I figured if we had good nutrition, good sleep, lots of water, natural herbs, etc. we would need far less from the medical community.
In 2003 October I joined Young Living believing the quality of their essential oils were beyond anything I had ever encountered. In December I ordered two blends, Highest Potential and Abundance. Watch this 6 minute video to discover why I mention this.
Over time it freed me to recognize the abundance of the universe’s energy is always flowing, it’s how I receive it that matters. Do I plug up the flow with worry and fear? Rejoice at the miracle that I get to experience the flow of energy constantly transforming into my life? No contest on which is best.
Money is not money as much as it is a recognition of what matters to each of us. If we respect and honor what it takes to create our flow of money, value how we use it, then we know it is simply a byproduct of how we feel about our connection with all of life, with the divine and with the gift of our own time on this earth.
May all your time be valuable to you.